California mom, 47, is arrested 'for having sex with her son's two year-old friends began circulating that she had sex with a year-old boy in September .. Newly-engaged Hoda Kotb spends quality time with her young. Get a second two mom with little boy stock footage at 25fps. hdSame sex couple sleeping on their sofa with their baby son sleeping on one of. In our follow-up conversation, I learned about the depression that Bex has struggled with since he was a kid and, as his mom told me, that his extended family.
California mom, 47, is arrested 'for having sex with her son's two year-old friends began circulating that she had sex with a year-old boy in September .. Newly-engaged Hoda Kotb spends quality time with her young. Online shopping for Clothing, Shoes & Jewelry from a great selection of Clothing, Accessories, Shoes, Jewelry, Surf, Skate & Street, Watches & more at everyday. Get a second two mom with little boy stock footage at 25fps. hdSame sex couple sleeping on their sofa with their baby son sleeping on one of.
Online shopping for Clothing, Shoes & Jewelry from a great selection of Clothing, Accessories, Shoes, Jewelry, Surf, Skate & Street, Watches & more at everyday. Get a second the little boy asks mom stock footage at fps. 4kYoung caucasian mother is walking in kitchen with baby in kangaroo carriage, dancing and positively smiling 4kSame sex couple family cooking biscuits. From life hacks and beauty tips to sex advice from the Golden Girls, fresh content A mom was mortified when her year-old son asked how often she had sex.
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Yeah, I had to. I needed the help. I couldn't do it by myself. I've been a dude the whole time! BM: Yeah I think I probably would have waited until I was like more settled down so that I could actually like answer questions.
Are you okay with being called a sister? Like what does that mean to you? And you were asking me these questions. A lot of the internet has decidedly turned against And she talked about that on the show. I think I expected a lot of like, a bad response to that. And I think I just felt relieved and surprised that the inverse happened. I called up Jihan to talk with her, because, as she said in her tweets, coming on the show to talk about something really personal ended up kicking off a lot of good in her year.
This happened less than a year after she decided to quit her full-time office job to finally try to support herself by writing. I think even me ending up writing full time is something that I spent a lot of years hoping would happen and it finally did and there was no reason to expect it, and so I kind of feel the same way about the relationship piece. One of the pieces Jihan wrote this year was for Jezebel. We posted it on our Facebook page.
And on a personal note, I want to thank you for all of your support for the the show, and me, during You have shared your stories with me, and with each other. Like Jihan did. Listening to each other and pushing each other to be more honest, brave, humble and kind. I need this. I think we all do. Happy New Year. Bex Montz says losing his dad was really hard. But he remembers feeling depressed even before that, as a really young kid, and not understanding why. BM: I got really sad when I was a little kid.
Like in bed late at night getting very sad. And having to attribute it to something. I remember one of your friends died and I would always attribute it to that, because that was the one bad dead thing that I knew happened.
That I knew was acceptable for me to be sad about. KR: And he cried at the end of every movie. Like and it was just this emotional outburst at the end of a movie and he would just be in tears. After his dad died, Bex continued to struggle with depression. He says junior high and high school were a disaster. What was the fantasy? BM: Oh boy. I was going to go straight to college and then go to med school.
I was going to be a doctor. Like I couldn't wait to get to medical school. Could not wait. BM: I mean…Freud would have a fucking field day, but I'm sure some of it was dad stuff. And some it was that like medicine was how I was taught, this is how you find a job that you find interesting where you can help other people and you can constantly be curious.
And like medicine is how you do that. Like medicine is that job. And so it felt really right and like the right thing to do. Bex went away to college. But he started drinking a lot. His grades started to slip. He was really depressed. And struggling with his gender identity. But his mom could tell something was going on. I'm like, this is a great idea and I'm online trying to find resources.
He had burned out at mental health on campus. It just was totally dysfunctional. Um, and I was trying to find resources in the community. I'm online, da da, da da. And I visiting and we were driving and he brought it up again. And I had probably talked to somebody at work—because I used my coworkers as therapists instead of actually getting a real therapist—.
KR: So I talked to one of my coworkers and I must have like said maybe it's something more. Because he was self identifying as a lesbian at that time and I thought maybe it's something more than that. Maybe it's bigger than this. And um, so we're driving and he brings up the idea again about getting an LGBT counselor and I just kind of looked over and I was like, are you thinking of transitioning?
And he goes mom! You can't just like ask people that out of nowhere! You can't just be like asking stuff like that, you can't do that. And then he started crying hysterically. And I was like, oh, so I guess we know the answer to this. BM: Like, okay. One: you're not supposed to ask that fucking question. Like, let me come out to you, Jesus goddamn Christ! And I think that I had like also recently bought dude's clothing. I was trying to be semi-secret about trying it a little bit.
Like there's this trial period that I wanted. And I'm not going to look her in the eyes and be like, no I am not considering this. But also, like I don't want to say yes. I wasn't ready to come out. And I was out. And I was totally out. BM: Uh no. And it was super stressful. It was just more stress. It was just super super stressful. So in saying, yeah I'm thinking about it.
I'm basically would be coming out to you. AS: And you as a mother, Katie. You're googling LGBT counselors - you're trying to find the way in to be helpful and loving. And like to hear Bex say, what you said in that moment was the exact wrong thing to say, like how does that feel? KR: Um, it doesn't bother me that much. Nothing was right. Nothing I did was right. Um, and he really never asks for help and the fact that he kept asking about getting an LGBT counselor, so yeah, I knew something bigger was happening.
Things were desperate and it needed to be addressed if that was it. BM: Yeah I don't hold it against you. It's just like, for sure, not the ideal way to go about it. Nothing about a lot of parts of my life have been ideal. KR: They're minuscule. For me. Compared to the other issues that have, the mental health issues. Those mental health issues were why Bex eventually dropped out of college.
It was after all this that Bex tried to kill himself. And particularly when I'm super depressed I don't want to be talking to anybody. And so I don't. KR: I never know what's real, what's not real.
What's okay. What's not okay. That I - you know, even when it feels like things are good, I don't trust it because it's just safer not to trust it, and to just kind of keep my eyes open. And think and wait and watch and try to be there. KR: Um, I've learned that I can't keep him safe. He doesn't share enough, he doesn't ask for help from me. So I know intellectually that providing room and board and access to a car, that those things are helpful for him but I can't keep him safe. I can't do that.
He has to do that. I haven't been able to do it. I've failed. KR: Yeah, I've had to learn. And it didn't work. I mean, because it's true. Like, I can just - I haven't made things easy on anybody. And like that's obviously not a choice. Like I don't purposefully wake up in the morning and be like, today I'm going to be an asshole. But it also doesn't feel good you know.
BM: Uh not a lot no. I don't think that I could make the sacrifices required to be a good parent. I think that it's really hard to be a good parent. I think mom has done a great job with it, but I don't think I would be able to do it. Like, there's this thing that you love desperately and you always want to be around, and progressively over the course of its life as it gets more interesting you have to let it go and like that sounds awful.
That sounds horrible. Like both of you guys are fucking idiots! Like, that sounds awful. I think I'm too self centered. KR: Do you think being a parent would take you out of yourself? That it would force you to stop spending so much time perseverating about things that don't need to be perseverated about?
And fill your day with other stuff? BM: I think that's idealistic. I don't think so. That, realistically, it would be that way for a while, and I would try really hard, but in reality, like, I'm going to deal with depression and anxiety and my issues around gender for the rest of my life.
That sucks and until I figure out how to deal with that in a constructive way, there is no way I'm going to bring another human being who has no say in it, there's no way I'm gonna bring someone else into it. If someone wants to come in on this, then fine.
That's my dating profile. AS: [Laughs] I have to say, when you said you guys are fucking crazy, like I think—I have a 5 month old baby—and hearing you—I have related to you, Katie, more than I have expected to in this conversation—and the puzzle of having so much love to give to your child but needing to find just the right slots where they'll let you give it.
AS: And sometimes you try and you end up repelling them like the wrong side of a magnet is such a daunting thing. KR: I mean, parenting is - it's crazy. And obviously I take care of patients when they're pregnant. And they think that this is the most complicated time of their life and like I can't even. I just let them think this is the most complicated time of their life because the reality is just literally unbelievable, of the responsibilities of being a parent.
And it's just a huge job. And you can mess it up. The anniversary of his death was just about a month ago. Um, I don't understand it fully. And I probably do need to see a therapist about it. BM: I just want to note. You've said that like five times so far maybe you should actually do it. KR: I think initially I did use the kids as an excuse and I really felt strongly that I didn't want to be bringing random people through their lives.
They went through enough and they didn't have to do that. But now my kids are adults and I have no excuse and I still come up with excuses. It's just, I don't know. KR: Um, you know, it's been a really long time.
And my life has been good without him, and I never thought I'd be able to say that and it relaly has. So it's sort of surprising, um. But yeah, it's changed who I am, for sure. I - I don't think there's any way it can't. I'm a different person now. There was part of me that was just completely crazy and wild about him and it was hard in the first years and I think—it dawned on me one day that I think that that girl left me. I think that it was too painful for part of me to want to be with him.
And I just had to let her go and she left and like I didn't know this happened but one day I just knew that she wasn't bugging me, that she wasn't making my life hard. And it was kind of a relief. She just wasn't there torturing me anymore. It just felt like I just wanted to be with him and there was no way I could do it and yeah she just went.
KR: It was a couple years probably after he died. At least a couple years. Four, five years probably. It's not a bad thing. But it's not super great either. AS: And Bex, when you think about your mom and what you want for her, what do you think?
BM: As long as she's happy she can do whatever the hell she wants. Like the most I can do is try not to get in the way of her happiness, but I know I will. Like I know -. BM: Okay, when I'm deeply, deeply depressed, which I inevitably will be again, that will get in the way of your happiness. BM: Yeah, by trying to take care of myself.
This is just me being self-centered. It's just like to take care of my mom, I need to take of me. It's all about me. We've been talking about motherhood for too long, come on, bring it back, bring it back.
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